Is it really such a crime?

Men with odd socks were in hiding this week as police were given ‘shoot on sight’ orders for men with odd socks.

The first victim of the law was Dennis Crass, who thought that he would be ok to wear a pair of socks which were both black, but slightly different.

Unfortunately for the 45-year-old milkman, he was wrong. Officers wearing special goggles identified the colours as being at least “three or four shades different”.

A marksmen snipered the man through the throat, and then made sure that the socks were incapacitated with two more shots.

Inspector of local police, Rhodri Hatchback told Cat Onion: “Odd socks are rife in Britain. It’s not just the odd man wearing them. It’s EVERYONE!

“Obviously, we can’t be shooting women and children. They will be sent to either jail or special Socks Detention Centres.

“My wife said to me, surely this is a bit over the top. It isn’t. Now she is serving 14 years in one of the centres.”

By Cat Onion News Team